Cool Hand Luke

From time to time when we were touring a lot, there were little situations that really exposed my pride. Little situations that weren’t a big deal in themselves, but they really made me examine my thoughts and motives.  This scenario has happened more than once: We’re playing a decent-sized show at a relatively cool venue (a.k.a. some gross bar with stickers of bands you’ve never heard of all over the walls). Just before we go on, I realize I’ve left something in the van that I need. Maybe it’s new drumsticks, maybe it’s my Bible, maybe it’s a room temperature bottle of water—it doesn’t really matter. I run to the van frantically because my stuff is already on stage and the guys are waiting for me. I get what I need, and run back to the backstage entrance. There is a security guard there. He is giving me a hard time. He thinks I’m just trying to get into the show for free. I have no credentials, but I’m pleading, “Really. I’m in Cool Hand Luke. We’re about to play right now. See, here are my drumsticks (or whatever). There’s a flyer on the wall right here. See, that’s me on the left.”

What is really going on in my mind is something far worse: “I don’t have time for this. I don’t have time for you. Who are you to stop me? I’m the reason you’re here. I’m the reason anyone is here. I’m important. I’ve got better things to do than trifle with you, etc.” I may not consciously think these things, but that’s what’s going on in my heart. Eventually, the security guard realizes I’m panicking and he reluctantly lets me squeeze by. These things are not actually a big deal, but oh how they expose my true heart, the ugliness of my pride.

But what if I were a bigger deal—like Thom Yorke outside of Madison Square Garden. How would I react then?  Or what if I was showing up to a huge art opening for my own works and they tried to charge me to get in? Or what if I was CEO of a huge corporation, but I forgot my i.d. card to get onto the top floor to my office?  What if the security guy wouldn’t let me up?  What if I was not only the CEO, but I built the building and it was named after me? What then?

Or what if I created an entire planet and everything on it, but when I showed up no one acknowledged me. What if the people not only didn’t believe who I was, but tried to kill me because of my claims even though I was the very reason they were alive? What if I could snap my fingers and have them all destroyed? What if I could make a giant  monster rise up out of the sea and strike fear into the hearts of mankind while angels lifted me up on a mighty throne and I demanded all living things to bow to me. What then?